its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
