so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
