I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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