nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
