He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
