As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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