I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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