i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
