I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
