I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
