Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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