I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
What a dumb baby whore.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
