so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
