Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
