Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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