Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
