It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
