I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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