Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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