so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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