I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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