She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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