My cat gives me a boner
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
