You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
