So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
