So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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