if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
