I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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