he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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