Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
