do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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