Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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