Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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