just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
