I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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