who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
