he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Someone shattered a urinal.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
