My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
