Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
