I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
