if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
