I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I booty called her while she was in labor.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
