I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
