i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Send help, water and tortillas.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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