What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Randomize