Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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