doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
