U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
