He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
