i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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